


Let Them Eat Cake.

by Lanna Michaels (lannamichaels)



Category: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bakery AU, Happy New Year! Have Some Crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-31
Updated: 2011-12-31
Packaged: 2017-10-28 15:01:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/309114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lannamichaels/pseuds/Lanna%20Michaels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten scenes from a bakery AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let Them Eat Cake.

1.

Vorkosigan Cakes prides itself on everything looking amazing; Aral won't let anything go out the door if he isn't willing to let it potentially be his Last Cake Ever. But it's sadly true that they don't always taste amazing.

"If that's the price of beauty, it's too damn high," Alys, queen of frosting, says.

"You know, Margaret's tired of keeping baker's hours," Drou reports the next day. "If you promise not to make her see the sun come up ever again, she might be willing to merge."

Four months later, Margaret's Bakery and Vorkosigan Cakes close for a week, reopening triumphantly as Kosti & Vorkosigan Creations.

And the rest is history.

 

2.

"I want a pony," the client insists.

"What do you say?" Cordelia prompts.

"Please?" Miles smiles winningly. "Two ponies?"

"One pony," Aral says.

"And lots of sprinkles and fudge! _Please????????_ "

 

3.

The rules for any kind of rush are: perfection takes time. You know the holiday or birthday or anniversary is coming a year in advance. You have nine month's warning for a baby. Graduation dates are slightly elastic, but only slightly. You are not surprised that sporting seasons end.

They have five calendars strategically and pointedly placed. They have a No Rush policy. Just because they can turn around an elaborate sheet cake overnight doesn't mean they want to. Aral quit Ges's Emporium over that kind of unending drama and resolved never again.

And then Kou and Drou elope.

"What did I do to deserve this?" Aral weeps over the icing. "What did I do?"

"Tell Alys that we could definitely, totally, don't worry, of course we can, do a cake for her last minute party. And don't expect sympathy," Padma adds. "You eloped, too. Now keep piping."

 

4.

Margaret Kosti has Certain Views on things, which means that whenever it's something for one of her kids, she shoves Aral to the side and does the damn decorating herself. Aral has to be dragged out of the way and sat on to keep the peace.

"But I was going to make it the best one ever," he always says mournfully.

And then Alys pushes him down again. "You were going to make it outrageous," she points out. "Maggie's going to make it classic. Learn how to lose."

 

5.

The weirdest thing they've ever done is a Divorce cake in the shape of a bonsai tree with the ex hanging from a branch.

The client loved it, though.

 

6.

And then there's the time Aral's brother graduates from the naval academy and the sword cake is a little too realistic.

Aral's pretty sure that they'll laugh about this in five years. Ten. Fifteen, tops.

 

7.

The rule is: Aral is not allowed to do walk-ins. The walk-ins will deal with Kou or Drou or Simon, select something from the display case, get birthday or congratulatory wishes written on it on the spot, and walk out happy.

The one time Kou and Drou were on their honeymoon and Simon had his hands deep in the guts of a marble cake, Aral convinced three walk-ins that what they really wanted for their wives's birthdays was a four-tier neon behemoth that four-year-old Elena had rejected for having the wrong kind of filling. The tragedy had only been averted by Cordelia refusing to sell it to any of them.

Aral's charisma is a terror at the cash register. This is why he's not allowed within five feet of it anymore.

 

8.

Alys and Simon learn everything that's going on in the neighborhood from the regulars who drop by every morning to buy the half-priced day-old cakes and the oops-we-fucked-up monstrosities.

Cordelia thinks it's kind of creepy, but she'll be the first to admit that it's been very useful.

 

9.

Aral agonizes over the Pride Fest special order. Agonizes.

"You are not a failure as a bisexual if it isn't the Best One Ever, Trademark," Cordelia tells him.

"Yes, I am," Aral says morosely, and crumbles up this sketch, too, and throws it out.

 

10.

Gregor's birthday is their yearly Oh, Fuck It, Why Not excuse. Gregor's family invites a few thousand of their closest friends and the budget is outrageous.

It's some kind of family tradition. Gregor's grandfather had had them, and so had his great-uncle and great-grandfather. Gregor's been having them since he was five. He likes it to be as much _party_ and as little _birthday_ as possible. The last thing he wants is a birthday cake that indicates it's his birthday, and under no circumstances may there be candles.

One year, they restaged Jurassic Park in dessert form. Another year, they made him a model of the solar system, which Cordelia ensured was to scale. They're not sure how to top last year's (a recreation of the Battle of Trafalgar, complete with tiny chocolate cannon balls) until Drou says, "Gregor's always liked fireworks."

It takes a lot of fiddling with wire and two complete collapses before it's finished. Gregor declares it the Best One Ever (Until Next Year).


End file.
